


Negai

by antimiya88



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-10-15 11:01:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10555212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antimiya88/pseuds/antimiya88
Summary: When Ohno Satoshi met Ninomiya Kazunari for the first time, was singing beautifully with his guitar in hands. In Satoshi's eyes the other was already a star. They got to know each other better... they got together and Satoshi could say without fear that Nino was the one for him. There was nothing more he wanted than seeing his boyfriend have his dream come true. The opportunity eventually came. But could it be that the very same opportunity was more like a hindrance for their relationship?





	

Title: Negai (One-Shot)

Author: Andy-chan ([](http://antimiya88.livejournal.com/profile)[ **antimiya88**](http://antimiya88.livejournal.com/) )

Pairings: Ohmiya

Genre: romance, angst

Rating: R

Summary: When Ohno Satoshi met Ninomiya Kazunari for the first time, was singing beautifully with his guitar in hands. In Satoshi's eyes the other was already a star. They got to know each other better... they got together and Satoshi could say without fear that Nino was the one for him. There was nothing more he wanted than seeing his boyfriend have his dream come true. The opportunity eventually came. But could it be that the very same opportunity was more like a hindrance for their relationship?

Disclaimer: Kazu belongs to his Oh-chan and Oh-chan belongs to his Kazu

 

 

For my beloved [](http://wjktl.livejournal.com/profile)[**wjktl**](http://wjktl.livejournal.com/) 's birthday! Otanjoubi Omedetou! <3

 

  


 

 

Negai

  
  


 

“I have to get up…” Satoshi mumbled to himself as he heard the alarm ringing awfully loud next to him. It wasn’t easy to work till late at night and then early in the morning but he needed both jobs.  
  
Almost stumbling on his feet as he got out of the bed, he hurried to the bathroom to take a quick shower. Half an hour later he went to the office to take the two packets of advertisement catalogues he had to give out for the day. His location was the train station nearby. It wasn’t an easy job since he had to stand for hours but for someone who had just finished high-school without having any further education was good enough to pay the bills.  
  
 The most difficult hours were the ones early in the morning when people hurried to go to their work and in the afternoon when they hurried to go back home. There had been times he was pushed with force or the advertisement catalogues had found their way to the ground with at least half of them torn up. That’s why he preferred the corner next to the stairs, close to the wall. There, he was safe from having such accidents.  
  
He climbed down the stairs as he headed to his usual spot just to realize that there was someone else who was already standing there. When he came closer he saw that the other was holding a guitar. “A street musician?! But he doesn’t look older than a high school student…”  
  
He shrugged and went to stand a couple of meters away. The young boy took his guitar on his hands, securing it with the band on one of his shoulders, and started moving his fingers on the strings. The sound came out soft… Satoshi turned his head on his left to look closer at him and to his surprise, he saw a small group of high school girls having stopped to watch. He was sure he had heard the word cute being repeated many times. He threw a quick glance to the other. He was cute but it wasn’t only that. There was something real in the other… was it his smile? His voice? The way he seemed to feel the song he was playing? Satoshi couldn’t define it confidently but somehow the music had helped him forget the tiredness; like a painkiller.  
  
He found himself smiling at his way back home. That day he had managed to finish earlier. It was easier as more people were slowing down to listen to the music. He had recognized some of the songs the other had played but there were also others that must have been his creation.  
  
***  
  
The next morning Satoshi headed to the station not knowing whether he would meet the other or not. The truth was that he wanted to see him again. It had felt as if he wasn’t alone… even if they hadn’t exchanged a single word, feeling him by his side for as long as he was standing there to hand people the advertisement catalogues, had somehow made him feel not as gloomy as usually.  
  
Immediately a smile appeared on his face when he saw him standing on the same spot, checking the tune of his guitar. He wasn’t sure for how long he had been staring at him when the latter turned his gaze to Satoshi.  
  
“Good morning” he said with a smile.  
  
“Good morning…” Satoshi mumbled, sure that his cheeks had blushed.  
  
“Ninomiya Kazunari” the other said with an even wider smile as he gave him the hand.  
  
“Ohno Satoshi, nice to meet you” Satoshi managed to reply in a tiny voice giving his hand to the other.  
  
That day they didn’t say anything else. Satoshi only waved at him when he finished. The same pattern continued for a couple of weeks. Satoshi wanted to find the courage to ask the other if he wanted to go grab a coffee or eat something. He had tried to ignore those thoughts that seemed to haunt his mind but during these past few weeks, all he could thinking of was him. He had even invaded in his dreams... making him wake up in the middle of the night confused and flushed.  
  
***  
  
That day, one hour had passed by when he gave the last catalogue of the packet. Sighing relieved, he leaned against the wall turning his full attention to the young musician. It was almost magical. He didn’t need those dizzying lights and smoke effects the big stars used at their performances… Just standing like that in his humble clothes was enough… For Satoshi, he was already a star.  
  
The other kept playing for almost an hour longer before he kneeled to take the money he had earned that day from this guitar’s case. Satoshi was sitting on the ground not even caring about his clothes getting dirty. All that mattered was the other.  
  
“I’m really happy to have such a fan!” he heard him saying flashing him a shy smile as he stretched his hand to help Satoshi stand up.  
  
Satoshi was sure his face was completely red; he was feeling it hot and lowered his gaze as he couldn’t find the proper words to reply. He had realized that he must have been staring a bit too intensely. It was the first time that he couldn’t control it. Usually, he made himself invisible; no one was able to read his mind but something in the young musician’s voice had shown that he had understood more than Satoshi wished he had.  
  
“Would you like to go for a beer?” he heard the other asking him, causing him to jerk.  
  
“Ok…” he managed to mumble and he was sure he had heard the other mumbling something that sounded too much like ‘cute’.  
  
Satoshi didn’t dare to say anything, as they walked towards a small bar close to the station, despite how much he wanted to. The other had both hands in his pockets while keeping a slow pace. They entered inside heading to a small table at the corner.  
  
“You can call me, Nino!”  
  
Satoshi looked up at the other gulping when he saw that he was resting his elbows on the table leaning slightly towards him while his eyes were locked on his.  
  
“And you can call me… however you like…” Satoshi mumbled embarrassed. “I don’t have a nickname…”  
  
“You don’t?!” Nino asked surprised. “Even though you’re so cute?! Well, I will call you Oh-chan for now!”  
  
Satoshi blinked. _For now?!_ _Could it be that…?_ His heart was beating so fast that he thought it’d burst out of his chest.  
  
“I’ll go grab the beers!” and with that Nino stood up from the table.  
  
Satoshi looked at him as he made his way to the bartender to ask him the drinks. He wasn’t much experienced in romance but he could swear that the other was actually flirting with him. But then again… was it possible?  
  
He was still lost in his thoughts and realized that Nino had come back when the beer glass was placed right in front of him.  
  
“You surely like to daydream a lot…” the other remarked before sipping some of his beer.  
  
“Why the train station?” Satoshi asked, his stare stuck on his still full.  
  
“Because many people pass by and that way you can earn more?” the other replied muffling a small laugh.  
  
“No… what I meant is why you play at the train station when you are this talented…” Satoshi mumbled avoiding to look at the other.  
  
“I like music and I like playing in front of people. I have a part-time job at night so that leaves me only the day… I thought why not do my hobby but also earn some money?! And well, since Tokyo is a big city, I tried to make the best choice!”  
  
“You’re new to Tokyo?”  
  
“Yes. I came almost two months ago… After I finished high-school!”  
  
“You’re eighteen?!” Satoshi said a bit louder than he should causing the other to put his hand on his lips.  
  
“Louder! The responsible one didn’t hear you!” Nino hissed.  
  
“You shouldn’t drink that…”  
  
“In other countries, eighteen is the limit of being an adult… I don’t do a crime! I simply enjoy a cold beer!” Nino continued in a low tone and winked at Satoshi who was looking at him in an unreadable way. “Don’t tell me that you lost your interest now that you found out my age…”  
  
“Eh?! Ah… No! Not at all!” Satoshi’s cores dilated at the realization of what he had just admitted to the other.  
  
“Good! Because I really like you! I had seen you a couple of days before I started… when I was at the search of the perfect spot and when I saw you giving those catalogues with such a cute pout, I realized I had already found it!”  
  
“You’re straight-forward…” Satoshi mumbled feeling embarrassed but also happy that the other had actually noticed him.  
  
“Only when I really want something! How old are you?”  
  
“Turned twenty past November”  
  
“We’re pretty close! I knew it!” Nino said enthusiastically and placed on the table his now empty glass. “Ah! That was great!”  
  
“May I ask you something, if I’m not too discreet?” Satoshi whispered.  
  
“Of course…”  
  
“Didn’t you want to go to the university?”  
  
“Me?!” the other burst into laughs. “No… Letters and numbers aren’t for me… I know my dream and I’ll pursue it however I can… even if it means I have to start by singing at the train station…”  
  
Satoshi looked at the other carefully. He could see the passion in his eyes. “I’m sure you’ll succeed…”  
  
“Thank you!” the younger one said shyly before he stood up. “Ready to go?”  
  
Satoshi smiled but nodded. They walked in silence but this time Satoshi was walking right on the side of the other, their arms brushing against one another. They talked about many things… from their favorite music pieces, to the movies or the books they liked… not so important things but somehow really enjoyable because that way they could discover each other.  
  
“I have to take the bus” Nino said as he pointed at the bus stop on his right.  
  
“Ah… I take the metro… I…” Satoshi took a deep breath before continuing. “Would you give me your number? I’d like us to meet again…”  
  
“And I thought you’d never ask!” Nino said in mischievous way as he took his phone out of his pocket.  
  
Satoshi had just added Nino’s number on his phone when he felt something hot on his cheek. _His lips… he’s kissing me…_ It was just a soft peck… but it was enough for Satoshi to feel his stomach twirl from nervousness. Before he could do or say anything, the other broke the contact and waved at him before running fast to catch the bus that was waiting for him.  
  
Satoshi was arriving home when he felt his phone vibrating.  
  
From: **Nino**  
I really had lots fun today!  
See you tomorrow, Oh-chan!  
  
He kept staring at the screen with a smile on his face. “I really had lots of fun, as well!” he mumbled to himself and walked to his house to rest a bit before he went to his second part-time job. Strangely, he didn’t feel bored… he had an energy he hadn’t felt in years.  
  
***  
  
Things kept on like that for the next few weeks. Satoshi would listen to Nino’s performance and then they would leave together; either to grab from a combini something to eat or to simply walk around. They had kissed a few times but things hadn’t really advanced from that stage. Satoshi felt, day after day, falling deeper and deeper in love with Nino.  
  
He was clever with a great sense of humor even if sometimes he could sound a bit sarcastic. They say the eyes are the mirror of the soul… and it was true. Nino’s eyes told him many things… more than the other dared telling him. Satoshi had got to know that Nino was actually a shy person, despite not being afraid to go after what he wants. For Satoshi, Nino was an angel…  
  
***  
  
It was the second weekend of June when Satoshi invited Nino to his small apartment for the first time. He knew that it was the other’s birthday and he wanted to cook something for him.  
  
“Hamburger!” Nino exclaimed enthusiastically as he saw the two plates on the small kitchen table.  
  
“I hope you’ll like it!”  
  
“Of course I will like it! First of all, it’s hamburger – how can I _not_ love it – and secondly, it’s made by my Toshi for me… That alone can guarantee it!” Nino turned around to go and sit when he felt Satoshi taking a hold of his arm.  
  
“How did you call me?”  
  
Nino turned his head towards his boyfriend and smiling caressed his cheek. “My Toshi… I had told you that I would call you Oh-chan for the time being… I had already decided that I wanted to call you Toshi from that first night but couldn’t… yet…”  
  
Satoshi pulled him into a deep kiss; the deepest they had ever shared. When he felt the younger gluing his body on his, his arms locking around his neck while his cute little fingers massaging softly his hair and nape, thought he could faint from happiness. His body kept turning hotter, his breathing becoming uneven… it felt like heaven… they kept kissing and it was only when a loud moan echoed in Satoshi’s ears that he realized what they were doing.  
  
“We should… huh… eat…” he managed to say while trying desperately to catch his breath.  
  
“We should…” Nino agreed but leaned closer spreading kisses on his jaw line before moving lower towards his neck.  
  
“Nino, you said that…” Satoshi closed his eyes, not wanting the sensations he was experiencing at the moment to stop.  
  
“But we do have dinner… a very delicious one…” Nino said meaningfully before sucking Satoshi’s lower lip.  
  
“Nino…” Satoshi said embarrassed and aroused in the same time.  
  
“I know you want me…” Nino said as he rotated his hips feeling the hardness in Satoshi’s pants. “I want you, too… Make love to me…” he whispered looking directly into his boyfriend’s eyes that had turned equally dark, filled with lust and desire.  
  
“I’ve never done it before…” Satoshi mumbled without breaking the eye contact.  
  
“I’ve never done it either. But I want to do it with you…”  
  
Satoshi nodded and took Nino’s hand leading him to his bedroom. Inside there was only a futon, a desk and a cupboard. The room was too small to have anything else inside but no one seemed to care at the moment. Clothes were thrown unceremoniously on the floor, as hands tried to feel the warm skin, to taste, to explore. There was a clumsiness in their moves but also a magic… Exploring something new together… Soon, Satoshi took more control, having laid his boyfriend underneath him, kissing him, licking him… doing whatever he could to listen to his sweet voice trembling weakly from pleasure… to the lustful moans… he wanted to give everything he could… everything he had…  
  
He entered him slowly, their gaze never breaking. Their fingers were intertwined, as a reminder that they were doing this together. The moves grew faster and faster as their bodies took full charge… Soon, sounds of slapping skins and soft whines, combined with filled-with-pleasure screams and moans were the only things that someone could hear… till they both came in soundless gasps… feeling their orgasms rip off their bodies.  
  
They remained on the small futon, cuddling. They were exhausted but happy.  
  
“This was the best birthday present ever!” Nino said shyly as he snuggled closer to the other.  
  
“I really didn’t hurt you?!” Satoshi asked with concern for the tenth time.  
  
Nino muffled a laugh. “You didn’t… it was just amazing, Toshi!”  
  
Satoshi kissed the top of Nino’s head. “I’m glad, Kazu…”  
  
“How did you call me?” Nino asked and turned so that he could meet the other’s eyes.  
  
“Kazu…” he repeated tenderly. “What?! You thought you’d be the only one who wanted to call your boyfriend differently?”  
  
“Toshi, I love you so much…”  
  
“I love you, too” Satoshi whispered before kissing him again, both forgetting completely the hamburgers that were waiting for them in the kitchen.  
  
***  
  
Satoshi was drying his hair with a towel when he heard his bell ringing. He didn’t manage to open the door properly when he felt his boyfriend having jumped on him, causing him to make a few steps backwards while trying to keep him in place.  
  
“Toshi! Toshi! Toshi! You’re not going to believe it!” Nino screamed right in Satoshi’s ear, his arms around his boyfriend’s neck and legs around his waist.  
  
The towel had found itself on the floor as Satoshi’s hands were holding Nino in place, a smile warming his face as he watched the other being this excited. “What happened?”  
  
“The tall guy! The tall guy that came to listen to me for three days in a row, you must have noticed him…” Nino said fast.  
  
Satoshi nodded. He had noticed him. “The one who would stay at the side…”  
  
“YES! HIM! He’s a producer! A producer! He gave me his card and told me to go to the studio to make a demo! Can you believe it? Me! Demo!”  
  
Satoshi’s eyes filled with tears. Seeing his boyfriend this happy was everything that could ask for. “I knew you would make it! I knew it, Kazu!”  
  
Nino claimed Satoshi’s lips with desperation, lust. Low groans escaped the latter’s throat as Nino’s tongue entered in his mouth, exploring every inch hungrily. They closed the door with difficulty before they stripped each other’s clothes right there… on the hallway… It didn’t matter… what mattered was that Nino’s dream was coming true…  
  
***  
  
Three weeks later and Nino was asked to sign his first contract but he was having his doubts.  
  
“They want to pair me up with another singer…” he mumbled as he snuggled closer to Satoshi.  
  
“You wanted to go solo, right?”  
  
“No, it’s not that… It’s just that… well… this other… Matsumoto Jun… Jin - can’t remember for sure - cannot be called an artist. He plays no instrument…”  
  
“Well, you will probably have a band with you… He can sing…”  
  
“From what I heard I doubt he can do that, too… his voice has limits… but I must admit he has the looks…” Nino continued pouting, looking like a kid.  
  
Satoshi muffled a small laugh. “I’m not an expert but looks do matter in every industry – let alone the entertainment one… but you have the looks too!” he muttered placing a soft kiss on Nino’s forehead.  
  
“They said that we can be perfect together since I’m innocent-looking while he’s cool-looking…”  
  
“Kazu, this is the chance you were so awaiting… Don’t reject it from the beginning… Give it a try and if after a while you still find yourself having doubts, you can always stop…”  
  
“You’re only two years older than me but sometimes you sound really mature…”  
  
“I don’t try to sound mature, Kazu. I know you want it… I simply do my best to see you happy…”  
  
“I love you, Satoshi…” Nino whispered as he rested his head on Satoshi’s torso.  
  
Satoshi smiled, his hand caressing Nino’s arm. “I love you, too…”  
  
***  
  
Six months later, NinoMatsu had become the biggest trend of the year. Photoshoots, interviews, live events… Satoshi could only smile, even if this smile had fainted a bit. In the past few months he hadn’t been able to meet with his boyfriend much, as there would always be something work-related. The other would send him apologizing texts and Satoshi knew he shouldn’t feel like that but he couldn’t help it; he was missing him… a lot…  
  
He had just come back from the bar restaurant he was working as a waiter. He heard his phone vibrating in his sack. He sighed. There wasn’t a need to read the text… Nino would tell him that he couldn’t make it that night, as well.  
  
He grabbed a beer from the fridge and opened the TV. He started zapping the channels when he came across the one he wanted to have by his side at the moment. Immediately, a smile appeared on his face. _You’re so nervous, Kazu…_ It wasn’t that the other was showing it on his face but Satoshi could see the way that his pinky finger was up in the air. He only did that when he was nervous… it was something that only Satoshi could know.  
  
_“We’re back with the hottest duo, Matsumoto Jun and Ninomiya Kazunari, better known as NinoMatsu! Their debut has caused a mania among fans and their debut album reached top3 from the first week. Nice to meet you!”_  
  
_“Nice to meet you!” the two said as they bowed._  
  
_“Matsujun and Nino… are these nicknames that you always had or they were given to you for your debut?”_  
  
_“People always called me Nino” Nino replied with a shy smile._  
  
The interview went on and Satoshi could only smile when the topic moved to their music… that spark on Nino’s eyes was enough for him to forget that he was missing him.  
  
_“Do you have someone special, Nino?”_  
  
_“Music... We both are dedicated on that… You have to think of it as something special in order to be creative and that’s where we want to focus on…”_  
  
_Jun agreed silently with a nod._  
  
_“What passionate young men you are!” the TV host said as a remark._  
  
Satoshi was sure he said many more things but couldn’t distinguish the words. It wasn’t that he hadn’t known. Nino had already told him that he should be ‘solo’ in his love life. That was the rule number one in the entertainment world, let alone the _boy_ friend part. He knew but still… it was hard to actually hear it. Satoshi scolded himself for being this stupid.  
  
“And Kazu thinks that I’m mature…”  
  
***  
  
The summer had arrived and Satoshi had to adjust to his new reality with Nino. They would speak on the phone and meet occasionally. Whenever Nino passed the night at his apartment, would fall asleep, tired as he was from everything. As more time passed, he would smell more often of alcohol and his clothes of cigarettes. It was another rule to go for a drink after a certain event with everyone. But that wasn’t what made Satoshi worry. It was the fact that the other wouldn’t talk to him the way he used to. Their discussions could go on for hours and hours, yet lately they would exchange simple words… making Satoshi feel that they were growing apart. He said nothing though. He had no right to make the other worry for such a stupid reason.  
  
***  
  
“I will move out from my apartment. The managers want us to rent a house close to Ginza with J” Nino revealed during their dinner.  
  
Satoshi felt his heart clenching. It was a couple of weeks ago since Matsumoto Jun from Matsujun had become J. “Ginza?”  
  
“Yes… I’m sure they said something about the image…”  
  
“But Kazu… Ginza is on the opposite side… it will take more than an hour for you to come…”  
  
“Toshi! You know it’s not something I decided upon! Why do you have to make things difficult?!” he was irritated. “I’m trying my best… and that means to also have to adjust to some things that I might not be so fond of… the least that I’m expecting from you is your support but all you think about is how much time it will take me to come here!”  
  
“Kazu…” Satoshi grabbed Nino’s hand. “It’s just that I miss you… We don’t see each other like we used to and I-”  
  
Nino stood up abruptly. “I miss you, too. I’m dead tired and yet here I am. I always speak with you on the phone. I send you texts whenever I find the opportunity. You know how busy the schedule is. I really never expected you to be this selfish, Satoshi!” and with that he hurried up to the door.  
  
“Kazu… please, I…”  
  
“Good night, Satoshi” and with that the door was closed.  
  
Satoshi was left watching the closed door blankly, his mind replaying Nino’s last words. _Am I really this selfish?_  
  
***  
  
Satoshi had just put his key on the lock when he felt someone close his eyes with his hands, making his heart skip a beat from fear.  
  
“Toshi, guess who?!”  
  
He sighed immediately as he heard his boyfriend whispering in his ear playfully.  
  
“Kazu… you got me so scared… You know that I hate it when people approach me from behind…”  
  
The other didn’t leave his arm. “I know it but your red face is so cute…”  
  
Satoshi smiled as he opened the door. It had been a while since he had felt that he had Kazu back and he admitted that he had missed him.  
  
“What is it? Something really good for you to be like that…”  
  
“Next month we will be holding our first concert! I will play the guitar on stage as I always dreamed, Toshi!”  
  
“My Kazu!” Satoshi wrapped his arms around the other tightly as he locked his lips on his. They both had their hands wandering whenever they could till they needed air. “Congratulations!” he said slightly panting. “You can’t believe how happy I am for you!”  
  
Nino giggled. “As a matter of fact, I think I can…” he rolled his hips meaningfully making Satoshi laugh as well.  
  
“Want to go to the bedroom?”  
  
“Do you really have to ask?!” Nino replied smirking before attacking the other.  
  
***  
  
The dome was crowded by young women who were holding uchiwas, had written the duo’s name on their faces, were screaming at the top of their lungs. Satoshi tried to ignore all of that and focus on his boyfriend on stage. There were back dancers, lights, smoke, a big wall behind them with special effects… It was almost magical but somehow Satoshi felt that something was missing.  
  
When the second part started, Satoshi saw both young men coming on stage with nothing more than their pairs of jeans. As it was natural, all the fans screamed louder than ever. Satoshi on the other hand was frowning. This wasn’t his Kazu… His Kazu would never lick his lips provokingly… he would never rub against the other singer… At the MC part, all the fans got crazy and demanded a kiss. Satoshi was feeling his heart beating faster and faster. He saw that the duo pretended not to hear it but it wasn’t because they wanted to avoid it; it was because they wanted the fans to demand it more passionately.  
  
They came closer till their faces were only a few centimeters apart. Satoshi’s throat had turned dry. He heard a girl next to him crying… and then he saw them… Nino’s lips were right on Jun’s… It might haven’t been a kiss of feelings but it still remained a real one.  
  
Satoshi couldn’t stay anymore. He made his way out and sent the other a text telling him that he had a headache because of the huge loudspeakers and the whole crowd. He was sure Nino would know that he was lying but couldn’t stay any longer. Perhaps he _was_ selfish…  
  
\---  
  
“ _Toshi, I know that it wasn’t a pleasant thing to see. I wouldn’t like it either… And you know that it meant nothing… I swear it wasn’t planned… but you heard them…_ ”

“I know… A girl next to me was literally crying…” Satoshi mumbled in a tiny voice.  
  
“ _It was our first concert and what I wanted the most was to run to your arms when I’d leave from the back door but you weren’t there…_ ”  
  
Satoshi could feel that the other was at the verge of crying and felt terrible… guilty…  
  
“I’m sorry, Kazu…”  
  
 He waited for a word… something… He only got a sigh before the call was ended.  
  
“I’m really sorry…” he mumbled with a trembling voice once again as he placed the phone on the table in front of him.  
  
***  
  
Satoshi went to his usual spot on the station. It was Sunday and this early in the morning wasn’t too crowded but it was his shift… he needed the money. He was left with only this job because the bar-restaurant would be closed for the next two months for renovation.  
  
“Good morning. Here again, huh?” it was the man who changed the advertisements on the walls who greeted him. They had met several times and the other, even though he looked a bit scary due to his large figure, was very kind. “It sucks when you have to work on Sunday…”  
  
“We have no other option, do we?”  
  
“No, we don’t…” the other agreed as he started preparing the new poster. Satoshi gasped when he realized that it was no one else but _him_ … Piece by piece it was fixed, revealing the news of a new variety show. Both of them were dressed in total black with Nino holding the other by the waist in a way that it could also be read as flirtatious. He had heard of the word skinship but actually seeing Nino doing it was hard. Besides… his boyfriend hadn’t told him about hosting any show. He was frowning, his eyes stuck on Nino’s face who looked back at him. It was so strange. He knew him yet he felt that he didn’t… Because this was Nino or Neen as _J_ liked to call him sometimes… he knew _Kazu_.  
  
“All these young men being this showy just to earn money and popularity… It’s sad…” the man muttered as he caught Satoshi’s stare.  
  
Satoshi wanted to tell him that he was wrong. Nino was an artist… a talented artist… This man on the giant poster was a product unknown to him but he couldn’t. “I’m sure that they have to follow such rules… but no one could survive without being talented…”  
  
“I don’t know… Seeing it, it feels fake… But I guess that’s what girls want…”  
  
Satoshi smiled bitterly. It _was_ fake… but it was the only way his Kazu could follow his dream. He knew that sometimes in order to reach it you had to make compromises.  
Three hours later, Satoshi had given everything and was able to leave. The weather was nice and he decided to call his boyfriend to ask him if he wanted to meet and go somewhere. He pressed the call button just to hear the usual recorded message telling him that the other would be informed for his call.  
  
He placed both hands in his pockets and started wandering around the streets lost in his thoughts. His eyes came across a paper placed outside a bar asking for experienced waiters. This was Shibuya and the bar itself seemed to be a good place. He entered inside to ask for the job. He didn’t have the luxury to wait till he found the best choice. Luckily, he was immediately hired as the manager told him that they would have many important guests on the VIP area that night and they needed extra hands.  
  
At nine o’clock he found himself, dressed in the dress code for the waiters, total black. He placed his phone on the back pocket of his trousers, trying to ignore the pain at the thought that Nino hadn’t called back. _He must be busy…_ He thought as he took the tablet on hand ready to serve. At nine thirty exactly, he was informed that the guests of the VIP area had arrived and that he would be helping there.  
  
He entered the room and saw a group of at least fifteen people. They were talking about something funny, if he judged by their loud laughs. He didn’t want to pay much attention to them. It wasn’t his job anyway. He placed carefully the three bottles of water that he had brought.  
  
“Kazu is such a clingy person. We were watching a thriller last night and he had glued on me like a leech!”  
  
Satoshi wouldn’t have paid attention but that voice was undoubtedly Matsumoto Jun’s. And if it was Matsumoto Jun the one who had spoken, then undoubtedly Kazu was no one else but _his_ Kazu.  
  
“It’s not my fault! You know I hate thrillers! You’re such a DoS!” Nino said in a whiny tone. Usually, it made Satoshi smiled. But this time it would only bring tears.  
  
“Yet, you watched it till the end… Does that make you a DoM?” Jun continued on the same challenging way causing the others to laugh.  
  
“Hey you… the waiter… don’t you have to go? You’ve been standing there for too long. This is the VIP room” someone from the group said in a loud voice, probably the manager, making Satoshi realize that he was still staring at the closed door.  
  
Startled, he turned around and bowed avoiding his boyfriend’s gaze. As he got out of the room, he felt tears on the surface but tried to keep them inside. It had been a while since he felt they were growing more and more apart. This night, seeing Nino among these people helped him realize something that he denied to accept; they were now parts of different worlds.  
  
\---  
  
“Satoshi!”  
  
Satoshi heard the other calling him and slowed down till he stopped.  
  
“You don’t have to say anything… I’ve known for a while but as you’ve called me in the past, I was selfish… tonight though I realized I can’t be… I don’t have the right to…” he turned around to meet the other’s shocked face. “I wish that all of your dreams come true. Good bye, Nino…”  
  
He started walking again and smiled bitterly when his deepest fear was confirmed. The other wasn’t following him.  
  
***  
  
A couple of years, passed by and Satoshi had decided to do something about _his_ dream. It had been two years since he opened a shop where he was selling wooden crafts that he was making. Since he was good with his hands, he had decided to go for it. He had found a grandpa who was delighted to share with him his knowledge and after a year of practice next to him, he was able to open his shop.  
  
Every morning he’d turn on the radio and clear the dust before the customers would come. He preferred listening to the radio because it was easier to avoid Nino. He knew it would only make him remember things he tried desperately to forget… and no matter how many years had passed by, it was still painful.  
  
It was a Saturday morning when he heard the sound of a piano. It was a ballad… he didn’t know the song but the melody was beautiful, warm.  
  
_“And now we listen to the new song of Ninomiya Kazunari. After the shocking news of the termination of NinoMatsu that made him popular, he now reintroduces himself to us with a song he has composed himself. The title is: It was you after all. Enjoy”_  
  
Satoshi had stopped doing whatever he was. The lyrics… the rhythm… Without taking notice, the tears he had tried so hard to keep inside were falling freely on his face. His heart was beating funnily. This was his Kazu… This was the musician with whom he had fallen in love.  
  
_“This was Ninomiya Kazunari. It was you after all. At his latest interview, Ninomiya-san revealed that this is a song he wrote for someone special to him… even if this person isn’t in his life anymore. Ninomiya-san will hold a small concert this Saturday at the West Rock Stage. For more information and invitations, stay tuned. We’ll be right back after a small break”_  
  
Satoshi couldn’t believe it. _Kazu…_  
  
***  
  
He took a deep breath as he gave his ticket to the check point. He entered in the small concert venue, this time not so crowded and definitely with no crazy fans. The ages were a bit older than teens. He took his place and nervously looked at the stage. After a while the lights turned down and the stage lights made _his_ small figure glow in the darkness. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt on top. In his right hand he was holding his guitar. This time there was only a tall stool in the center of the stage along with a few more musicians at the back.  
  
Nino started playing the guitar and to Satoshi’s surprise, familiar sounds reached his ears. He found himself humming the melodies… it was his _Kazu…_ It was the boy with whom he had fallen in love… only that now he had grown into a handsome man. It was two songs before the end that their gazes met. It felt as if time had stopped; as if the ones sitting next to him had disappeared and it was only them… And then he saw that Nino’s eyes were shining more than usual… asking him for forgiveness… telling him he was sorry… telling him that… _it was him after all_ …  
  
Satoshi couldn’t stop staring at him. No matter how much he had tried to forget about him, he couldn’t. Because it was him… It would always be him.  
  
Nino bowed after the song and after drinking a bit of water that he had with him. He told them that he would end this small concert with his new song; the one he wished its words would reach this person; his first fan, as he called him. Satoshi could listen that Nino was at the verge of crying and all he wanted was to climb up the stage and take him into his arms… tell him that it would be ok.  
  
The song finished and loud applauses filled the hall. Satoshi applauded along with a wide smile on his face. He asked the responsible ones the exit that the artist would leave. When he reached there, he saw a few fans waiting for autographs. He decided to wait a few meters away.  
  
Eventually, he saw him coming out. With a humble smile, he signed and took photos with his fans. Once they were gone, he sighed deeply before lowering his head as he started walking away with heavy, slow steps.  
  
“Could I have an autograph, as well?” Satoshi whispered as he wrapped his arms around the other’s slim waist. “I think as your number one fan, I deserve it more than them…”  
  
He could feel that Nino had frozen. “Toshi…?” he asked, trying to hold his tears.  
  
“It’s me…” Satoshi replied and turned the other around so that their eyes could meet.  
  
Nino was crying, his voice trembling. “I’m so sorry… I… I tried to convince myself that I hadn’t done anything wrong… even though I knew it… I hated it but I thought that it was the only way… I had to follow their rules… everything was controlled… everything was fake… I tried to convince myself that a dream would always come with difficulties… but when you left me… I… wanted to run after you… but then I realized I had hurt you too much… I had no right to keep you by my side… I couldn’t be called a boyfriend… It’d be cruel… But the more I stayed alone, the more it was killing me...  
  
It was two years ago when I passed by the corner I had seen you for the first time… and then I saw an advertisement of NinoMatsu and I questioned myself what the hell I was doing… I decided to stop. That wasn’t what I wanted to do… I focused again on music… I gave up the apartment and almost all the money I had earned… The companies are strict… but I didn’t care… I tried to find you but your landlord had told me you had left. I was praying to meet you but I wouldn’t… Perhaps, I had to pay for everything I had done to you…  
  
But today I saw you… at first I thought it was my eyes playing with my mind but then I saw closer and realized that you really were here… As I was coming out, I was afraid that I wouldn’t meet you… I know that if I were I your position, I would probably not come either… but you’re here… and-”  
  
Satoshi couldn’t listen anymore. He hugged him tightly, his lips ghosting in the other’s hair. “Shhhh…. I would be here…”  
  
“Even after all the things I did?” Nino asked still having tears.  
  
Satoshi smiled as he brushed them away with his thumbs.  
  
“Yes… because I am your biggest fan…”  
  
“Toshi…” Nino burst into louder sobs as he held the older one desperately. “I… I love you so much… so much… I never stopped loving you… only you… I swear it… It was always you…”  
  
Satoshi pecked the top of Nino’s head as he kept him in his arms. “I love you, too… I loved, love and will always love you… Welcome back, my Kazu”  


 

 

  
THE END

 

 

 

A.N. Sooo minna here's another Ohmiya one-shot! ^^ Lately there are quite a few! LOL I know it's angsty but it has a happy ending this time!!! It is very slightly based on 'Negai' and there's also a mention of 'Sore wa yappari kimi deshita'! I tried to make it a whole story! Hope it turned out ok! :)

My dear Sandy I hope you liked it!!! ^_^ I know it's a bit angsty - I know - but I didn't want to write a simple, smutt-ish one... I wanted it to have some depth... ><" Now, if it turned out the way I wanted, I don't know! xD I honestly tried my best! Love you!!! <3

 

*Concerning cross-linked chaos I believe I'll post it on the weekend. Tomorrow I fly back to Greece for a couple of weeks so I won't be able in the week... Gomen...

 

 

I really hope you enjoyed it and as always your comments are <333!!!

 

 


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